ThingOne and ThingTwo

There are two women who go to the gym each day at about the same time I do, and they're the youngish, mid-twenties, mean girl types.  You know the ones.  The ones who constantly have this expression on their faces.



They're both in great shape, no issue there, but I often catch them watching me (and others) as they work out -- then they'll quickly look away and whisper to each other and glance back with  . . . that look.  The look designed to make us average humans feel judged and want to crawl under a rock.

I've nicknamed them ThingOne and ThingTwo.

Subtlety -- not their thing.

And as mature and evolved as I am on most days (did'ya snort laugh at that?  didjya?  me too.  Almost couldn't type it), these girls irritate me.  I try very hard to smile pleasantly at them and ignore their bitchy looks and whispery discourse . . . and I see others at the gym trying to ignore them as well. . . .  but I'm not going to lie.  I really just want to smack them in the head with a dumbbell.

Well yesterday, nature did it for me.  ThingTwo (the brunette . . . ThingOne is a redhead) dropped a weight on her foot.  I'm sure it hurt (chuckle . .. probably a lot . . .  giggle), and ThingOne made a big production of helping her over to a bench and having her sit down, all the while looking around the gym as if to say "Ice, little people, someone bring us some ice!"

No one did.  I glanced around and it was fascinating to see how interested all the other gym goers were in the clock, the TVs, their iPods . . . ANYthing but ThingOne and ThingTwo.  Even more interesting was the thinly veiled glee with which everyone tried to avoid eye contact with them and the attempts to suppress laughter (varying degrees of success on the laughter suppression efforts  . . . , but to their credit, virtually everyone at least tried).

I really like my gym because ThingOne and ThingTwo aside, most of the people who go there are just normal people like me.  It's not like the L.A. Fitness or other GloboGyms where people are there to see and be seen.  The trainers and staff are all very nice, and the people who work out here are all ages and fitness levels.  It's comfortable.  People smile at my gym and I really like that.

But yesterday, I felt an enhanced sense of camaraderie with the people at Platinum Fitness . . . A shared sense of "that's not how we play here."

I don't wish ThingTwo ill and I sincerely hope her foot is feeling better.  I also wish her (and ThingOne) a little humility -- there is something wrong with everyone.  It's the one thing we all share.  The one thing that makes us ok.

 . . .  after they left, I carefully wiped the vaseline off the weights they were using.
                   (just kidding).

What the hell?

I feel MORE tired after trying to completely remove a stupid Internet toolbar from all instances of all browsers on my computer than I do after running two miles.

I hate malware.

HATE.

The wonderful thing about Pessimism

So I've been obsessing -- OBSESSING -- about the Funky Monkey.

I really want to do well and at least not embarrass myself -- and I have been worried about my shoulder and scared to death that I will fall.
Then I read a blog that says those suckers are greased anyway.

Odds are, I'm going to fall . . . In fact, I am now planning to fall and that makes preparing for this so much easier.
Don't get me wrong, I'm going to try and I am going to be very proud of each rung I achieve.  It's not like I'm going to just jump into the water, but hey, when the deck is stacked, one needs to revise expectations.

I feel better about this, actually.

Haven't had time to post -- and have gained 5 lbs.

This past couple of weeks has been so busy and I'm not going to lie.  I'm feeling discouraged.

I don't usually lose weight when I strength train and I wasn't expecting to, but I wasn't expecting to gain.  I haven't gained inches (been measuring)  but I have gained lbs and even though I know it's probably not a bad thing at all, seeing the needle on the scale go UP instead of down has me feeling discouraged.

On top of that, the more I work out, the more my shoulder hurts.  A year or so ago, I was on a trip to New York for business and had to run to catch a flight while carrying a very heavy laptop case.  During that jog, the case yanked hard on my shoulder and I felt a popping tearing sensation and my shoulder was sore for a day or two.
Perhaps I don't actually know the difference between "not a big deal" pain and "hmmm think I might have damaged something" pain . . . but I'm suspecting that I actually damaged my shoulder at that point.

Anyway, since I've been using it more and challenging it more it's been, well, a pain.  I'm going to go to the doctor to get it checked out to see if I actually do (as I suspect) have some rotator cuff damage.

On the "Up" side -- there is a groupon this week for bootcamp classes that are being held at a park close to my house.  I think I'm going to sign up.  Their focus is interval training and that is supposed to be very good for strength and endurance training.  I've always wanted to do one of those "exercise in the park classes (although in my mind it was something relaxing like yoga) so I may give this a try.  It's cheap.  Nothing to lose really.

So that's where I am on this stuff.  Feeling down in the dumps and kind of crappy.  I'm sure it'll get better, and I'm sure once the doctor can tell me what is wrong with my shoulder and can do something that helps it feel better I'm sure I'll feel a lot better.

We can do this.  I know we can -- but I haven't been feeling on top of the world recently.

In other news -- we have made a lot of progress on the guest room renovations so when you get here, your fit self can work out with my flabby self and motivate me.  :)